Sexism explained.
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Although sexism has been around for a long time, the
official psychological term “ambivalent sexism” was not coined until 1996 by
Dr. Peter Glick and Dr. Susan Fiske. They proposed that sexism can be split
into two distinct categories: hostile and benevolent sexism.
Hostile sexism
This is the type of sexism that everyone stereotypically
thinks of as sexist attitudes, such as that women are weak, incompetent and
sexually manipulative. It views them as inferior to men and objectifies them as
sexual objects to be used merely for male pleasure. This includes things like
telling offensive jokes, domestic violence against women and catcalling at
women in the street.
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| image source: instagram @generationsfinestt |
Examples of hostile sexism from
Glick and Fiske’s sexism scale (The Ambivalent Sexism Inventory) include:
“Once a woman gets a man to
commit to her, she usually tries to put him on a tight leash.”
“When women lose to men in a fair
competition, they typically complain about being discriminated again.”
“Many women are
actually seeking special favors, such as hiring policies that favour them over
men, under the guise of asking for "equality."”
Benevolent sexism
This is a much more subtle type of sexism that is sometimes rephrased as "chivalry." It is often
brushed off by people as being “not really sexist.” This involves
praising women’s traditionally feminine qualities and encouraging traditional
gender roles. This includes things like opening doors for women, carrying
things for them and buying gifts for girlfriends/wives out of the blue.
Although all of these things seem like nice things to do, in the context of men
consistently doing these things for women, they imply that women need men to
take care of them and look after them. This stereotypes women as the weaker
sex, and encourages them to stay in inferior societal positions to men.
Examples of
benevolent sexism from Glick and Fiske’s scale include:
“Women should be cherished and protected by
men.”
“A good woman should be set on a
pedestal by her man.”
“Men
should be willing to sacrifice their own well being in order to provide
financially for the women in their lives.”
The topic of sexism - particularly benevolent sexism - frequently comes up in discussion between me and my boyfriend. He argues that things like holding doors for someone, buying presents, wanting to provide for financially for them and wanting to protect them aren't sexist, they're just the sort of things you do for someone you love, male or female. And I can see his point - and I know he is does not truly endorse benevolent sexism or we would've broken up a long time ago! And despite it being the opposite of traditional gender roles, I also like to buy him gifts, pay for our meals out together, hold doors for him.
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| image source: instagram @generationsfinestt |
I think the problem arises with people's expectations of these things; females expect these things from their male partners more so than the males would expect from their female partners. In fact, an article published last year by Hammond and Overall (2013) showed just how bad benevolent sexism can be for relationships. When women hold benevolently sexist views, they are more likely to experience more sensitivity about problems in the relationship, a faster decline in relationship satisfaction when experiencing these problems and more hurtful partner behaviour. The authors concluded that women who endorse benevolent sexism are quite frankly "vulnerable within their relationships."
After a lot of thinking and many discussions with my boyfriend about it, my conclusion is that it's perfectly acceptable to hold the door open for your girlfriend - as long as she holds it for you sometimes too.
References:
Hammond M.D.; Overall, N. C. (2013) When relationships do not live up to benevolent ideals: Women's benevolent sexism and sensitivity to relationship problems. European Journal of Social Psychology, 43(3), 212-223. doi: 10.1002/ejsp.1939
Glick, P.; Fiske, S. T. (1996) The Ambivalent Sexism Inventory: Differentiating hostile and benevolent sexism. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 70(3), 491-512. doi: 10.1037/0022-3514.70.3.491
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